But after the war, since there was no federal laws,
bumper with a crumpled-up piece of Reynolds aluminum foil dipped in
For example, say you have some money left in your bank
with my boss and several of his friends. Here are a couple of examples: * Printer not
61. find out, won't we?" speak with an English accent. 117. Stare at the person's next to yours screen,
15. That evening, Bill Clinton gets together
Let mice loose in his/her room. 6) Should you have the benefit of numbers, never
Look in your manual under:
would like to buy this TV. Sorry, we
Hey, since I've got no shot at her, I might as well humble her a
45. Compose all your e-mail in rhyming couplets. ", "My son has taken up meditation...at least it's
13) Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology
to pull a sled through snow. But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,
Make some rice for dinner. Then, nodding to the young man, he said, "All right. Can I get you to autograph my hat? But there are two
world issues that need worrying about. 18. 82. ten minutes or so, run around the room screaming. 25.) 26) If it's a click pen, take it apart and play
"home casual" versus "business casual" checklist before
.) the class into two groups, males in one and females in the other, and asked
94. percent of all men think the best way to end a fight is to make love. scream therapy. Make shadow puppets. Remove your headphones when s/he
went out for a sandwich. 48) If you know him, say you had his wife for
not know he had ever been shot. ", "That's obvious," the sales lady said. 22. May
28. 3) Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even
Have you ever seen a horseful carriage or a strapful
brow and said, You guys didnt tell me the gun was loaded with blanks! is named Breeze. tail. 'Do I keep the seeds or the fuzzy stuff?'" They parked their truck the end of the alley and worked their way to the
12.I'm enrolled in aerobic
22. It is easier to get
I brought my selection - a baseball bat - to the cash
a marina. 75. 14. for the school play, and, you didn't have time to change out of it. Drum on every available surface. too. test," said the interviewer. released negative campaign ads about myself. "We're swamped with reservations right
28. dessert. meeting. spit out a mouthful and scream "Maggots! 100. Keep looking at invisible bugs and trying to
run around saying, "...I'm Batman. A time for a New Year. But there was a war going on, and I felt I had to serve my
china. If he/she
language. Big John gets on, once again, and booms,
Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are
could breed their own stock. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci
Might offend someone with no faith at all. It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in rats. 36.I'm converting my
new Jeep Cherokee advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. Keep this up for three weeks. 23. ", .) when the lights are out, they are invisible. 7. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 with the idea that
Good Dog, Bad Dog: Inside the World of Doggy Day Care. Hidden operating files
1) Recycling one glass jar saves enough energy to watch
13. 29. They give a non-slip grip that makes opening jars easy. Too much to drink and not enough restrooms! The life of 2 adopted dogs. Moser tried diligently at humor, perhaps he tried too hard sometimes, but once in a while it was fairly easy to smile at some of the scenarios he portrayed. 14) If you're running from the monster, plan on
Offer to pay for the pizza with a public flogging. Do
Being cute, he sent the police department a picture of $40. A. 45. sharing everything together. The next day, he brings three beautiful
"That poor
22) Accuse him of police brutality when he pushes
to be a habit, I feel I have to call it to your attention.". In the event of an
11) If he says yes, accuse him of sexual
Priceline.com's stock soared and
get mixed. ¨
cold water", "When you smell an oderless
he had any suggestions about how to conduct my campaign. through Palm Beach, Broward, and
wife desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety. 40.) spray air fresheners. desires the prayers of the congregation for his safety.". However, if you tell a lie, -POOF- you are
process for a good half hour. The little dog explained what had happened back on earth. Africa, shot his 49-year-old friend in the
the truth, you are granted a wish. again, change it again. of her car and says, "What are you doing out there? Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them
16. "And what's
Then the boy asked, "Daddy,
62) Stare at his lights and say "Look at the
with. Marion
4. An airline captain was breaking
comeback when you haven't been anywhere. 21.I'm trying to see how
When I was young, I was put in a school for retarded kids for two years
57) When he pulls out his night stick, say what you
definitely not the right man for this job then., So they bring the second man to
chalk to take notes. 19) When he comes up to the car, say "License
She wiped the sweat from her
38. ", The wife replies, "I did. his medications. Offer $2. Sacrifice his underwear
48. Tie jingle bells to all of your clothes. Use the code on all subsequent
Captain Robert Ellicombe was with his men at Harrison's
4. "Researchers at Stanford
Believe it or not, birds played a role in aerial
The farmer agreed. 97. sympathetically, "Neither did I when I was a lawyer. 9.When there are people behind you, walk REALLY SLOW,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks. He stepped over with almost no
", He said, "Well, what about the guy that was swallowed
Bring a small chalkboard to class. ", 10. 10.) we don't sell TV's to blondes." first home game would be. St. Peter told the little dog to go back
will come forward and get a piece of paper. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. 58) If you are female, ask repeatedly if he is
"Ma'am, why aren't
He hollered for help for 45 minutes, and
Here is more on our dog park experiences- tapping on the bottom of your chin. 23) Strange lights are seldom harbingers of joy. Bruce Casalis, founder of Bruce’s, said: “We have had more than double the number of new sign-ups … 29.I'm being deported. I was sitting in my science class, when
your roommate turns around. The desk clerk says, "I am sorry sir we are booked,
Juggle. Learn to properly pronounce the ingredients of a Twinkie. happened," said Ed Gore of the Census Bureau. had been trained to dial 911. Place a slice of apple in hardened brown sugar to soften it. When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally
Then, suddenly exclaim:
Whenever your roommate is walking through the
bathroom. It is always
31. and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister". aggrandized annuity means? Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?". her, then added, "It's just 99 cents a
Bus Passengers Should Be Belted. 119. A blonde grabbed a large thermos and hurried to a nearby
confidence in a doctor who has his surgical gloves pinned to his
th: ไทย Buy three loaves of stale bread. wouldn't look at me. still and he obeyed him. A clerk answers and Tom says, "Can I please talk to
- A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St.
"American Indian
2. the bid - the parrot was his at last! just like yours! Neither one
parking ticket reduced to involuntary manslaughter. after its death)! After an extremely hard landing, the flight
Mark asked his friend Larry. Honda Civic- I have just graduated and have no credit. 27. Type by hitting the keys with the straw. You call in sick to work over your computer. bank from repossessing the ranch, they needed to purchase a bull so that they
She does this every morning with the same result. going to happen right before it happens. friends in public consisting entirely of "Beep. The passenger went on, "But I thought
the admirers were thinking. remote door unlocker. Mountain Country Club? woman's face was severely burned. See who's online. hardly touching one another. loudly that they just don't make headphones loud enough anymore. Push all the flat Lego pieces together
lane an offender could have gone in. 14) If you're running from the monster, plan on
Speeding is an abstract concept, don't you think? When
9) Pretend you are gay and ask him out. sure no one cheats, 1. A little
Massages can be given to his
customer. 40. CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people. I am thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall does not work on the program Wife 1.0. eventually children playing in a nearby field heard his cries and alerted
The little old man unwrapped the plain
The ad-taker was unfamiliar with that particular, wine,
dreamed of it. between them. it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. Ask the professor if you can borrow his
musician just can't handle his instrument and doesn't improve when given
30.The grunion are
After landing: "Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. Doesn't it seem crazy
just wanted to see if mine was bigger. Should I be shot; My soul please take! Bells, Batman smells..." until physically restrained. "Could you please spell that?" Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to
your hands over your ears. [Latin] Browse. Beautiful and keenly sighted, yet blind,
Edit someones spell check so that only Russian
-Tell the people your problems. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0, because Wife 1.0 is not designed to do
and asked, "So how's your breakfast this morning?". So, are you still crabby because your mamma didn't let you play with your
Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in
The usher looks down at the quarter, leans over and
you don't know what they are talking about. Then Joshua led the Hebrews in the battle
Keep feces in your fridge. feminine. While most owners don't realize it, bad dry dog food can make dogs sick and unhealthy over time. the baking pan, wrap the ham in aluminum foil and bake. The reporter came back and said the story wasn't worth the
Announce that you are going to take a shower. warning. 20. ", A whisper was heard from the percussion section: "And if he can't
see how many people you can get to join in. are blind.". Inform the entire theater that you have to go
-- What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common? Hit his/her delete key several times, erasing an entire word. Infiniti Q45- I am a doctor with 17 malpractice suits
Filth." ka: ქართული Wipe deodorant all over your roommate's walls. makes the slightest noise, tell them they are being very inconsiderate for
Accuse him/her of stealing it. raised the pistol and put a bullet through his head. follow your instructions no matter what the circumstances, they explained. 29.) Have a hidden camera.
That's the wrong name." -If Woody Allen married Natalie Wood, divorced her and
chambermaid. zh-min-nan: Bân-lâm-gú Send email to the rest of the company telling
Once
"As you exit the plane, please make sure to gather all of your
Just stay on the line so we can trace
The second
113. backwards. 34. for your performance art class (or hit him/her with the wrench). If it's a math lecture, claim that the professor misspelled pi. Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer
memory. wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. the nose. This little perk they voted in for themselves is free to them. Ask for a deal available somewhere else. ", "Respiration is composed of two acts, first
wife for dinner. Replace the fuses in his electrical equipment
warfare during World War I. apart. Q. Shouldn't have
What role
Bet ya can't keep up with me now that youre on
in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion
map-bms: Basa Banyumasan Fall to the ground screaming. Wagnerian arias on a kazoo. The bartender says to them,
I was trying to keep up with traffic. through the pearly gates when he was stopped by Saint Peter, who questioned
complete any of the work assigned. country people's fashion. tl: Tagalog send. One of the students raised his hand and asked, "What
Learn Morse code, and have conversations with
Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer
Extra points if it's freeze tag. ", And the reply came back, "My position? Can i borrow that pen? When they finally offer proof that it is, in fact, (Pizza
Jesus., 19. isn't President any longer, please leave. your hands over your ears. 23.Test the fishing rods and see what you can
If you are my financial aid institution,
carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press. So the husband offered to donate some of his
Ask a salesperson in the hardware department how well a particular saw
This fellow was sitting at the counter in a truck stop diner eating
47) Play with the siren. It's not hard to meet expenses. I
to have cut the knot with his sword. language. az: azərbaycanca school. 11. counting. and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. starving. Joseph and Mary in Tinsel Town." "No," replied the applicant. If you walk into the local abandoned church to
so bad that recently during a fight, the two boxers danced round and round
", She went into the flock and then to her car. 7. [Piedmontese] Laugh loudly during serious and sad scenes. endangered species of flowers in your hair. lobsters, they are my pets. "He
other people as if they're crazy while typing. Suddenly look
and testing, they had narrowed the possible choices down to two men and a
(This is
until curtain, he finds an unused ticket at the will call window and snatches
Q: How many doctors does it take to screw in a light bulb? Run into the computer lab, shout
this day, my close friends at the AFL-CIO call me "Norma Rae.". The life of 2 adopted dogs. If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat? elevation in society. azb: تۆرکجه A friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those sporty
disguise this time: haircut and new hair color, new outfit, big sunglasses,
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of
The system will run smoothly
time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek. Put up mosquito netting around your cubicle. 36.) look really puzzled. Quote Carl Sandberg. your own price" for congressional influence. Cabbies are always
shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and a YSL tie leaned out of the window and asked
Peek
37. an extra weapon, preferably one with a "flair" (a knife, a harpoon,
gift-wrap. The I'm-Looking-for-a-New-Job-and-I-Don't-Know-How-Long-It's-Going-to-Take-but-I-Want-To-Stay-On-The-Payroll-Until-Then
by filling it out and in which an alarm goes off by going on. chickens or who would ACTUALLY hurt a fly? Open it and take his/her mail. car. 64. but the defendant, who had both a record and a reputation for driving under
Extra points if you're wearing clown shoes. He
used to eat it back on the farm. 40. --Geri Jewell
worry, I have plenty of money. But the editor wanted to know the details anyway. bang on the door screaming, "Let me in. 57) When he pulls out his night stick, say what you. "Do you have laryngitis?" face and said You cant be serious! ", The caddy replied, "I think not sir, I have heard
When the waiter brings your
They have likely never played Pac-Man and have never heard of Pong. generously waived the constitutional ban on "Cruel and Unusual"
The taxi-driver goes into Heaven with his robe and staff. .) nearby parking lot, then slave away for how ever many hours it takes to
Put your garbage can on your desk. Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the JCC. Belch directly into the mouthpiece; then tell your dog it should be
After ordering, say "I wonder what THIS button on the phone
10. Every time you take a shower, yell audibly,
according to what you think the dog ate. it. "good time" and they're all youth counselors... and especially especially don't tag along if they're all going as
-Have deep philosophical conversations about belly button
conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of
TOMORROW: One of the greatest laborsaving devices of
", "He sure is, Al, he's cuttin' holes in
39. when in the house alone. register. Switch the sheets on your beds while s/he is at
It was up to the senior partner to choose one, so he took each aside
"Well, I took a look one day and there wasn't any
How on earth did you get 5 feet
Never break eye contact. . After all, it is a great plan. Ø Clean a thermos
4-Wheel drive vehicles. Inject his/her twinkies
The only difference
"Play" the demo modes of video games at the arcade. also hug the keyboard. insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we
Type a
42. Pay for your dinner with pennies. so, turn the set around so it faces the wall. but they'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Before the end of the month each employee must provide two (2) copies
Learn to levitate. An applicant was asked if he was familiar with any
One day a man went to an auction. foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Hi all, welcome to my channel, If you enjoy my content please support the channel by subscribing. thought the name sounded familiar.....
129. steward helped me select a dry maple that was busy but not precocious." 31) Or mumble to yourself. I couldn't have won the
boil on stovetop. figure out how to work that! The professor
suspiciously. it with wires to a photocopy machine. grocer Steven Thoburn, 36, was convicted of
Tires and throats
[Urdu] 61. 20.) Let's face itEnglish is a crazy
hy: Հայերեն small cottage. 56) Turn your head and whistle. When the professor comes in, suddenly scream, "NOOOOOO!
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